One of the questions that I receive the most, after quitting my corporate 9-5 office job is:
“What do you do with all these free time, don't you get bored?”
To be honest, at first it wasn’t a boring feeling but more a panicking one with voices in my head going like:
“OMG! What I’m doing now?!? ARGHHHH”
“Do NOT waste time! You have to be Productive, Proactive, not Procrastinate!”
Therefore I started getting busy with every possible activity, training, set up an online business, sell stuff, declutter home, learn new things … Still high from the “Productivity Rush” I was so brainwashed by my corporate job.
Having the sense that the more I do, the more I should feel good about myself, Do Do Do Do was my mantra, my days were full of work and social activity to fill the void of emptiness that was growing inside me.
Then I had a sudden realisation that I was a “human BEING” who has become a “human DOING”, I defined myself since then with what I was doing, with my studies, with all my jobs, jumping from a defined path that lead to another never ever seriously stopping and questioning that the path might have been strongly influenced by family or society pressures, having the illusion that this was what I really wanted… But if that was true, why I felt so frustrated and empty?
Our jobs are so tangled in our personality that we define ourselves by the job we are doing, more than sexism or racism we are all affected by JOBISM!
Aware of that, I started my journey in discovering what I wanted and who I was, along to explore my core values, and to DO that I needed to stop filling my life with “doing” or “achieving” and start a personal journey into self-discovery and self-awareness.
So here my 3 Tips if you want to start your self-discovery journey :
1) Stop, and ask yourself what you want!
Have you ever stopped and asked yourself what you want, who you are, what are your core values and what drives your everyday life choices?
From School till the Job you are in now, have you ever took the time to ponder IF what you are doing is aligned with who you are? It seems trivial, but we are so busy to jump from school to work that we never take the time to reflect if we are on the right path.
2) Dance your day out and live infinite minutes.
Take the day as songs or dances, songs and dances have no final purposes, they are enjoyable as for the time they go, and you fill happy while listening or dancing it, not worrying about how it should or should not end.
Listen to your body and stop as much as possible to enjoy the moment you are in, and you can live infinite minutes of your life, never again:
“Whoa! This year has passed so fast I did not know what I was doing all the time”.
3) Think often about Death, and enjoy more what you have.
It sounds creepy, however, I love the “Death Perspective” it put everything in balance, bringing up the right priorities in life.
I basically tell myself at the end of the day something along this line:
“ Well, if I’m going to die today… It was a great day to die!”
Even if I spent the whole day binge-watching Netflix! Death put everything in the right perspective and makes you enjoy what you have.
As in the famous book the TOP regrets of the dying, by Bonnie Ware, the first 3 regrets are:
I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me!
I wish I hadn't worked so hard!
I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings!
And the answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe and Everything is always: